My Multiple Smiles – Multiple Birth Awareness Week 2016

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For Forty-seven years I have dreamed of being where I am tonight….

Bone weary yet deliriously happy, I currently have my twin three and a half year old boys lounging all over me as I attempt to write this blog. The monster truck carrying numbers is playing for the 374757564th time this week, which is only a few shy of The Big Red Car by the Wiggles, (Yes we only have the originals here!), yet revenge is sweet when I see the boys singing along to Chitty Chitty Bang Bang while I capture it all on video for their 21st.

You can keep your fast cars, rock concerts and gym memberships. I get enough exercise from two little boys making Wooooooowooooo siren sounds chasing the baddie (me), for failing to indicate when I turned left at the kitchen bench. I’m sure the infringement ticket will cost me two yoghurt pouches and an extra story to read at bedtime. Bad Daddy!

The joys of fatherhood come to me wrapped up In two big smiles, two sets of mischievous eyes, two pairs of glasses, two pairs of arms wrapped around my neck and two infectious sets of giggles that will forever warm my heart.

So how do I know that I have found my calling?

This has to be the easiest question I have even been asked. The answer is simple….when I hear the simple words of “Daddy, we love you” being softly spoken in my ear when I least expect it.

Sometimes what you were meant to be isn’t associated with money, fame, other people’s ideas of what you should be. Sometimes your calling is just trying to be a good Dad.

Now I am not the wealthiest man in the world, yet I bask in the richness of the affection of my twin boys. I am not perfect, far from it, yet I see the cheeky glint in my boy’s eyes, the laughter that fills our house to overflowing and the never ending, riotous, conversation between our twin boys. I have never felt younger, or older, than what I do right now.

Yet it hasn’t always been this way, at times you can feel broken, at times you feel you are doing it all wrong. At times I don’t think I have the patience, love and strength to be ‘that man’, yet…..I try. I try because I see who is watching me, emulating me and learning from me. I promised a lot of things to my boys, of which a few of which have been broken, but I’ll gladly accept a speeding ticket or any other infringement notice my boys dish out for me in return for another hug or extra book at bedtime.

Christian & Connor 2012 – 2016

You see, being blessed with multiples comes with a price, yet it also comes with some of the most life changing rewards.

It’s not always been this way, yet through the AMBA family, I have found a way. You are never alone, someone always knows and understands and no family left behind are not just mere words or platitudes, they are actions we encounter daily. Having joined the BMBAS (Brisbane Multiple Birth Association Southside) in 2012, I soon found myself on the committee as the Dads Contact and EPIN (Expectant Parents Information Nights Support) and learning how much volunteering can change your life. Meeting beautiful people, forging lifelong friendships, watching babies turn into toddlers before your very eyes and most of all, loving every moment of it.

Well it’s time for bed and I’m being hauled off to read whatever the boys picked up from the library this week. I can only hope that it has rocket ships, planets, moons and stars in it! [I can say that can’t I? lol]

So, if you’re lucky tonight, you will be tucked into bed while your temperature is being taken with a paddle pop stick between your toes, while your other child is opening your mouth like a lion tamer, and has decided they are going to crawl inside your mouth to inspect your tonsils and check out what you had for lunch.

Enjoy celebrating your MBAW in 2016. May multiple blessings permeat your house and the silence be broken often and loudly with the mirth of happy kids.

Goodnight, be well and may your dreams of being on your local AMBA committee at next months AGM come true!

You Both Turn Two…..A Promised Letter From Dad

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A letter to my sons, Christian and Connor, for their 2nd birthday…..

Dear Christian and Connor,

As I promised last year, I am continuing the tradition of writing you a letter for your birthdays. Twelve months ago, I was a new Dad wondering what lay ahead for both of you. Well, with another 12 months that has passed, you have both taught me much. You are now both walking, talking and showing true independence in your own right.

To Christian,

You have shown a fascination for letters, numbers, a bit of rough play and an explosion of languages. Counting busses on the way to day care and asking for ‘one more pwease’ when it comes to bedtime nursery rhymes with a finger held in the air has us smiling from ear to ear. How could we refuse?

You also acquired glasses for the first time and try wearing them, but looking over the top of the rim is not a good look for someone so young! 😉
Knowing your Alphabet, backwards, forwards or in any order through your own creative play has us amazed. Counting to twenty shows us you have a great love of numbers and letters and you would be happy to watch theses all day if you could.

Here are some things about you…..things you like, don’t like and things that you do:

1] Ripping up the Alphabet mat and getting Connor and I to help you put it back together.

2] Any clip with letters and numbers.

3] Daddy’s magic blanket act when going down to sleep, with a few tickles thrown in for good measure.

4] You love your veggies, chips, bread and gravy. You will eat just about anything, so long as your spoon can reach your mouth. lol

5] Sunday mornings on the back deck, sitting with Connor on our big table asking to share my ‘Cuppa Tea’ with him. This is a highlight of my week and yours.

6] The app, Hooked on Phonics, is one you ask for all the time. TTTTTTT, BBBBB, OOOOO and the letter A & S are your favourites. Watch the video we have of you both doing this. You will soon understand why we love you guys.

7] ‘Go go Daddy, Cumma Cumma where eva are…busses’ is all I hear on the way to daycare…very cute. 😀

8] Every time you wake up, you jump up and start saying,’Hi Connor’ while Connor tries to wake up but only grins at you with a groggy smile.

9] You love shaking hands, high fives and tens and bump when greeting people.

10] You love day care and all the teachers there…Andrew, Lanie, Helen, Jacqui, Prittle. You never pass up on an opportunity to receive a stamp for being a good lad as well and especially using your manners.

11] You have an affinity with Yiayia, you love her to bits and always look forward to going to her place to visit and seeing Papou as well.

12] You love going to the park as well and have a had time convincing you to leave with always ‘one more’ slide or ‘my turn’ at something in the playground.

13] The Magic ABC Song comes on and you always run to Mum for cuddle time. This is your special time to hug mum and lay with her just before you go to bed.

14] Whenever you see me lay down of the floor, you drop everything and run over to tackle me and roll around laughing all the while. You are way to ticklish for you own good.

15] You need a haircut…we just haven’t got around to it yet.

16] Your nicknames are Christo & Mr Christian.

17] You have a beautiful disposition, so long as you have a midday rest, you sleep through the night and have the occasional dream. You hate being covered at night and always throw your blankets off.

18] You love playing with your cousins, Anastasia, Kostas, Bailey, Charlotte and Zoe.

19] You are afraid of just one thing….the big vacuum cleaner…it sucks, I know.

20] You are funny when trying to imitate a plane! You make a clawing action and make a sound that is a cross between a wild tiger and a plane. O_0 A future Tiger airways pilot perhaps? 😉

21] You love ‘Acey’ (the air conditioner in your room, his friend Robbie the cleaning robot. You treat Robbie like a pet dog….haha.

To Connor,

You are the cheekiest, little monkey, and you play it as one of your strengths with great effect. You help Christian count busses on the way to day care and the rest of the time you are the quiet charmer. You never walk anywhere! You have to run and you’re good at it too. lol
You have acquired your second pair of glasses and your doing an awesome job of wearing them,….except when you take them off at the most inopportune times, like when we are driving through the Clem 7 tunnel.
You are the creative play expert. You love cooking things for us to taste test, then you settle up to a yummy meal of invisible food only to finish and put the dishes in the sink. Yep, Master Chef look out!
Our little engineer who loves to build and stack blocks higher than yourself, always brings us delight when you stand back and say ‘Yay!’ When you have achieved what you set out to do.

Here are some things about you…..things you like, don’t like and things that you do:

1] Peek a boo and hide n seek come easily to you as a game. Going all ‘pretending to be shy’ is very cute and works well on the ladies. 😉

2] Any blocks within reach are always stacked up nice and high until your demolition brother arrives on the scene!

3] Daddy’s magic blanket act when going down to sleep and hugging your best friend Scout when you go to bed. Saying goodnight to every decal, stuffed animal, ‘Acey’ (air conditioner), Christian, Mum and I always makes you smile.

4] You are the ‘neat’ eater and will always choose meat over your veggies, except when Yiayia makes it.

5] Sunday mornings on the back deck, sitting with Christian on our big table asking to share my ‘Cuppy’ with him. This is a highlight of my week and yours.

6] The app, Hooked on Phonics, is one you ask for all the time. TTTTTTT, BBBBB, OOOOO and the letter A & S are your favourites. Watch the video we have of you both doing this. You will soon understand why we love you guys.

7] ‘Frogging’ and ‘Giddy Up’ in your highchair has always made us smile.

8] Whether you’re sitting on the bus, out for dinner at a restaurant or walking down the street, you always say ‘Helooooo’ to everyone and wave, even to people who don’t acknowledge you, you just persist and wave in their face until they do. Haha!

9] You love Dean the indigenous elder who comes to daycare, you are just fascinated with his Didgeridoo.

10] You love day care and all the teachers there…Andrew, Lanie, Helen, Jacqui, Prittle. You never pass up on an opportunity to receive a stamp for being a good lad as well and especially using your manners.

11] You have an affinity with Kostas, your cousin, you follow him around and always look forward to going to see him.

12] You love going to the park as well and have a had time convincing you to leave.

13] At day care you always run off to do some cooking and the toy microwave is your favourite …right after Mr Snail.

14] Whenever you see me lay down of the floor, you drop everything and run over to tackle me and roll around laughing all the while. You are way to ticklish for you own good.

15] You need a haircut…we just haven’t got around to it yet.

16] Your nicknames are Froggy & Mr Connor.

17] You have a beautiful disposition, so long as you have a midday rest, you sleep through the night and have the occasional dream that makes the monitor go off at night. When you’re not well, you end up on the lounge laying on Mum as you try to go back to sleep. P.s You snore!

18] You have a fascination with Robbie the robot vacuum cleaner. You always ask ‘Robbie’ no matter where you are or what time of day.

19] You are afraid of three things….the big and little vacuum cleaner and Robbie. Oh and you’re not quite sure about the dark either.

20] You are funny when you imitate Fire Engines and Ambulance sirens! Wooooowooooo!

21] You have one dimple on your right cheek and use it all the time when you try to get your own way.

 

So,……you have turned two and you are no longer babies. You are little boys now and watching you grow has brought many smiles and laughter along the way. We hope the next twelve months leaves us with even more memories that we can treasure and reflect upon.

 

For as much as you share the same birthday, you are definitely two very individual people, so many things the same, yet so many things that are different. You are both well mannered and say ‘OK’ as you nod you head when you understand what we say. You are both cute beyond belief and we cannot wait to share with you the joys that are yet to come…

Lots of Love from your Mum n Dad……xoxoxoxo

Finally…Time With Friends!

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It may not seem like a big deal, but after two years of doing quick outings and running home for the boys to sleep or feed, least they become feral, we finally had a full morning at a friends place.

The kids had morning tea with someone their own age and the adults all got to have coffee and nibbles. We suddenly felt like ‘adults’ again. 🙂

 

A small thing was a big win for all of us. You forget after a while that getting out and about is more than just visiting the park or pool. It is as much about renewing friendships and reconnecting with other adults without the sound of Peppa Pig, Sesame Street or other kids entertainment ruling the house for a few hours.

Watching the boys interact with someone their own age was awesome! The social skills and manners that we have spent hours on teaching them were able to be put into a real life scenario, with fantastic results. Hearing the boys say please, thank you and asking to share was, for this Dad, a heart warming one.

Whether it was playing with doll houses, bikes or blocks, there was minimal need for supervision as all the kids shared and exchanged ideas.

Suddenly there was that little moment when we realised that our boys were not so little anymore. A mixture of sadness and delight in one of those bittersweet moments as your recognise things will never be the same. Although it is only momentary, another milestone has been ticked off.

We can finally go out as a family and our world has once again become that little bit bigger than our current bubble of four. With the boys second birthday less than two weeks away, we have now been hit with what others have been saying for years, but never really understood the meaning of ‘time flies’….until now.

It may sound silly, but sometimes we just wish they stayed a tiny bit younger for a little bit longer.

Overall, we wouldn’t change a thing, yet knowing we won’t have any more children means everything is both a first and a last puts a slightly different perspective on everything we see and do.

For now though, we are just glad to be out of the house and in a place where all four of us can have age compatible friendships and a whole lot of fun along the way….

After all, it’s all about the memories we make that creates the moments we will cherish and share at a much later time in life, and for this, we have been blessed multiple times. Living in the moment has a new meaning now and we are going to  take full advantage of it ever opportunity we get. 🙂

Daddy Returns Home……To Two Sleeping Boys

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Tonight I flew back into town after being 2000KM away for most of the week for work. I missed the boys being awake by 30 mins, but it didn’t stop me going in to their room to watch them sleep.

it is something I have always done, and hope to be able to keep doing for years to come. It may not seem like much, but to me…..well, there is nothing like it. It is always special to see my boys looking so content, even if they look like they are trying to invent some new form of contortionistic pose.

Getting the chance to cover them with a blanket, touch their face and listening to them sigh in their sleep just makes me feel like, well,like a real Dad. Looking at their faces, which I swear have changed since I last saw them, makes me both melancholy yet warms my heart at the same time.

Tiny, bittersweet moments, knowing that these days will not last forever. They are always precious moments that I treasure, even more so after being away. Being able to just ‘be in the moment’ is such a rare joy in such a busy world these days. Somehow nights like these stir things deeply within me to the point of a small tear even though I am not feeling sad. It is something that I can truly not put into words for you to understand.

It’s a moment, it’s a time un to itself, it’s is a another place that I relish, rejoice and relax within. A place of total calm that washes over your entire being. My soul takes joy in connecting with them while I watch their chest raise and fall. It is with complete pride, love and affection that I know these two boys have stolen my heart for all eternity.

I’m a Dad…..wow….just saying it seems so surreal sometimes. There are times before they arrived that have now faded into insignificance. There are days ahead that I both look forward to, yet silently hope they take a little longer to reach.

They turn two next month, the time has both raced by and stood still at the same time. Memories have been forged, milestones have been met and surpassed, moments of inspiration, frustration, beauty and bewilderment all thrown into a blender and released within me at the same time.

This has been the ride of my life, a dream of tender patience mixed with epiphanies to many to count and yet I am here….I am watching and I am in love. Yes there will be trials, tribulations and tears. Yes, there will be more memories, madness and laughter. Yes, it will be over all to soon but tonight……tonight I just give thanks.

Tonight I get to be a Dad, tonight I am a Father and tonight, for just a few silent minutes my world are my boys sleeping as I watch over them.

Tomorrow, ….. *deep breath*….. tomorrow I just can’t wait for them to discover I am home and see their reactions. Daddy slipped away in the night early in the week and now Daddy has returned the same way.

Tomorrow is going to be a hug fest in bed when they wake me up

Tomorrow is a day I look forward too in so many ways. Tomorrow I will still be home and tomorrow is going to be something so special……

Tonight my dreams shall be sweet and I hope yours are too…..